~A mother like no other~

People only appreciate the efforts of a mother until they live far from their home. In this blog I will explain the great impact my mom has had on my life and the story of that moment when I truly appreciated my mom. Also, I want to remind everyone the importance those human beings that gave us life have in this world and show that all moms should be appreciated with the whole heart at all times. Alright, let’s roll♿.

The legendary mothers always want to maintain their kids until the last moment because they are afraid that the kid will suffer. But, there is always a moment in the huge ride of life where a goodbye needs to take place. It’s a simple law of life. The unity between a mother and a child depends on the unconditional love that the kid receives since day one. So if the string of unity maintains itself solid throughout the years this will maintain itself attach forever. For example, my mom always since I have memory attempts to eat dinner at the table with our whole family every day and I consider this has maintain us attach throughout life.

At times in life we found ourselves having internal conflicts where we will disown every single thing. In those moments maybe your mom felt alone and had a panic attack that you considered unnecessary to some extend. Then time passes by and in the most unexpected moments the hand of God appears through other people in the form of angels which makes you truly appreciate everything your mom has done for you.

This great and strong person in the form of an angel that I’m describing is Karen Taylor. She in particularly has helped me see how everything makes sense since there is great similarity between her and my mom. In order for me to arrive to that point I have to tell you a story first. My very first week at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign I arrived wanting to have some fun. In the hallway of my dorm I was talking to some seniors on wheels, a few able-bodied, and Karen a graduated student that happened to be visiting that weekend. She was there for the weekend due to the fact that she missed campus. Plus, it was a last good bye to her friends before getting married and going off to live in the Dominican Republic. As a new student I wanted to explore and know which bars were the coolest. So she gave me a list of all her favorite bars and she even invited me to go check some out for the first time in Champaign. Once we were at the bars this one old guy saw me and a couple of others on wheels. Apparently we reminded him of his kid that had pass away so he was kind enough to give us 40 dollars. Karen bought us all tequila shots and a big fishbowl with the money. Once I was about to take my shot she scream, “Anuar’s first shot at UIUC”. In that moment I knew I had found my place in the world. All of those people I went out with that night until this day are my friends.

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Let’s dive into the point, my friends in the dorm always do a bar crawl every year that contains five bars. That fun and meaningful night took place a couple weeks ago. Throughout the year me and Karen kept in touch I didn’t know why exactly but God already had his plan. A lot of students that have graduated usually come back to campus just for this bar crawl. To my fortune Karen came back from Dominican Republic. That night we talk a bit of everything plus we remembered that last time she was there. At the end of the night two people said goodbye one of them left running with tears in her eyes. So I roll it over to see what was going on with her. In that moment Karen fallowed me to ask me where I was going. So I told her I wanted to see what had happen because nobody deserves to cry. Right after that I begun to understand my mom when she started telling me if only you knew about the times I have cried in the Dominican Republic. I left everything my family, a culture, friends and I been trying to learn a new language to be with my husband. I feel lonely sometimes plus him and his family don’t understand me at times which frustrates me. But, I know I got stay strong and try hard despite having a few rough moments because all of this is part of an  adaptation process. It made sense I bet is common to feel like that when moving to a different country. All those things Karen left my mom left when we came to this country so her strength remind me how strong my mom has been. In my moms case she left everything for her whole family. It seems like an advantage for her at least she had her children to support her as well. But, we got caught up in our routine and our selfish actions didn’t allowed us to support my mom when she needed the most. However, my mom remained strong she never left us because of unconditional love. As far as Karen I gave her the fallowing advice: “Hanging in there keep on trying since this stuff has ups and downs but eventually you’ll get use to everything”.

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Thanks to Karen I understood everything the why of every little thing and that sometimes I might be hurting my mom with my selfish actions. I fully appreciated my mom a year after I left her and this happens to a lot of children when they leave their moms. But, I am grateful with God that he gave me the opportunity to realize how selfish sometimes my family and I were to my mom. I now understand my mom’s frustration to learn english, what it was for her to leave a culture, a whole family, a stable home, a comfortable economic position, her needs to travel and even that desire she has of eating out at a restaurant every Sunday after church.

The greatest example of my moms huge love is the fact that she left everything and she continues to leave it behind with unconditional love towards a family that often didn’t appreciated. But, one day not too far from today God will paid her off for everything that she has done. For now, me and my siblings are about to finish a large ride of accomplish professions that started to get built on the moment both of my parents support it us by taking us to the pre-school “Crisol”.

I’m sorry mom I want to apologize for not being able to teach you english and not giving you my support when you needed the most. I want you and the people to know that moms like you aren’t found in this world too often but I’m glad God choose you to be my mother. I love you mom with my whole heart and from now on I want to enjoy every moment that I get to spend with you to the fullest instead of arguing over meaningless things. In the end respecting the law of life is truly worth it. Mom if I left it was for those reasons to make every single one of your sufferings worth it and to appreciate you even more.

Alright to close up, I want everyone reading this to know that all moms should be appreciated in every moment not only on Mother’s Day with a picture on Facebook or Instagram. These amazing human beings gave us life and they have a full time job for life with their children. Especially those moms that have a kid with a disability have a tougher job. Mothers are the ones that raise the leaders, presidents, teachers, professionals and examples of tomorrow so this job is the most important job out there. Importantly, those moms that are with you since day one deserve to be with you until the end. So if your reading this right now maintain your mom in your heart at all times, thank God for your mom every day of your life, and don’t forget to support her at all times.

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———————————👇Version en Español👇———————————-

~Una mama como ninguna~

Uno realmente aprecia el esfuerzo de una madre cuando se marcha lejos del hogar. En este blog les explicare el gran impacto que a tenido mi mama en mi vida y la historia de el momento en el que mas la puedes realmente valorar. Ademas les quiero recordar la importancia que todos estos seres que nos dieron la vida tienen en el mundo y tambien quiero que sepan como se tienen que valorar de corazon todo el tiempo. Bueno pues rodemos♿!

Las madres legendarias siempre quieren mantener a los hijos en el hogar hasta el ultimo momento por temor a que el hijo sufra pero siempre llega un momento en el largo recorrer de la vida cuando una despedida es inevitable es simplemente la ley de la vida. La unidad entre una madre y un hijo depende del amor incodicional que el hijo recibe desde la raiz. Asi que si el lazo de unidad se mantiene solido atravez de los años este se mantendra unido para siempre. Por ejemplo mi mama siempre desde que tengo memoria trata de que toda la familia coma junta y eso nos a mantenido unidos a lo largo de la vida.

A veces la vida en distintos momentos te hara que se tengan conflictos internos quedras renegar en esos momentos en los que tu mama quiza se sintio sola e hiso un arrebato que consideraste hasta sierto punto inecesario. Luego en los momentos mas inesperados de la vida llega la mano de Dios atravez de otras personas en forma de angeles lo cual hase que valores lo que tu mama a echo por ti.

Esta gran persona fuerte de la que escribo se llama Karen Taylor ella en particular a echo que todo me haga sentido por su similitud a mi mama. Para llegar a ese punto les contare la siguiente historia. Mi primer semana en la Universidad de Illinois en Champaign llege con ganas de divertirme. En mi pasillo de mi dormitorio estaba platicando con un par de seniors en silla de ruedas, mas otros que caminan y Karen la graduada que estaba de visita. Ella estaba ahi por una semana ya que extrañaba la universidad solo queria despedirse ya que se casaria y se iria a vivir a la Republica Dominicana. Yo queria saber cuales bares estaban padres. Ella me dio una lista y mas aparte me invito a salir a los bares por primera vez en Champaign. Ya en el bar un señor nos vio a todos en las sillas y aparentemente le recordamos a su hijo el cual ya habia fallecido. En ese instante nos dio 40 dolares. Karen con el dinero nos compro shots de tequila y justo antes de yo tomarme el mio grito, “El primer shot de Anuar en Champaign”. En ese momento supe que ahi habia encontrado mi lugar en este mundo. Todas las personas con las que me sali ese dia aun son mis amigos hasta la fecha.

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El verdadero chiste es que cada año mis amistades del dormitorio realizan una noche en la que se va a cinco bares. Esa noche se realizo hase un par de semanas. Durante todo el año yo y Karen hemos estado en contacto, era extraño no sabia el porque pero Dios tenia ya su plan. A esta noche estudiantes que ya se graduaron regresan solo para divertirse una gran noche. Para mi fortuna Karen regreso de Republica Dominicana para esas fechas. Esa noche ella y yo platicamos de todo un poco y recordamos la ultima vez que estubo ahi. Al final de la noche dos muchachos se despidieron y una muchacha se fue corriendo con lagrimas en los ojos. Yo rode asi ella queria saber que le pasaba. En ese momento Karen me siguio pregunto a donde iba. Yo le dije quiero saber que le pasa nadie merece llorar. Justo en ese instante comenze a entender a mi mama cuando ella me empezo a decir si supieras cuantas vez yo eh llorado en la Republica Dominicana. Lo deje todo mi familia, cultura, amigos y lenguaje por mi esposo. Me siento sola aveces luego ni el ni sus amigos y familia me entienden eso me frustra. Pero, seguire intentando y me mantendre fuerte apesar de esos momentos dificiles que en ratos tengo porque es parte de del proceso de adaptacion. Estoy seguro que ese es un sentimento comun de cuando la gente se va a otro pais. Todo eso que Karen dejo mi mama lo dejo  cuando nos venimos a este pais entonces su fortaleza me recordo lo fuerte que mi mama a sido. Pero, mi mama dejo todo por toda su familia y mi mama tan si quiera contaba con el apoyo de sus hijos pero que muchas veces por sus rutinas y acciones egoistas no se lo brindaron cuando mas lo necesito. Mi mama aguanto no se desespero por amor incodicional. Yo aconseje a Karen a seguir intentando le dije que tendria muchos altibajos pero que fuera paciente que todo estaria bien. Pronto te acostumbraras mas a todo le mencione.

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Gracias a Karen llege a entender todo el porque de las cosas y que a veces he lastimado a una gran mama con mis acciones egoistas. Valore a mi mama completamente al año que me marche de ella y a muchos hijos tambien les sucede pero estoy tan feliz de que Dios me a dado la oportunidad de darme cuenta lo egoista que fui y hemos sido contigo mama. Ahora comprendo la frustrasion de mi mama al no saber ingles lo que fue para ella dejar una cultura, una familia entera, un hogar estable, una posicion economica relativamente comoda, su necesidad por viajar, y hasta sus ganas de siempre salir a comer despues misa.

El ejemplo mas grande de su gran amor es que todo lo dejo y lo sigue dejando atras con amor incondicional hacia una familia entera que a veces no lo supo valorar pero algun dia no muy lejano Dios se lo pagara. Por lo pronto yo y mis hermanos estamos por acabar un largo recorrido de carreras realizadas que se empesaron a construir desde que mi mama y mi papa nos brindaron su apoyo al llevarnos al kinder crisol.

Perdoname mama por no enseñarte ingles y no apoyarte cuando mas lo necesitaste. Quiero que sepas y las personas sepan que mamas como tu no estan en todos lados del mundo pero estoy tan agradecido con Dios que te eligio a ti especificamente para ser mi madre te amo con todo el corazon mama y de aqui en adelante aprovechare cada instante contigo en lugar de discutir por cosas inecesarias. Al final de cuentas vale la pena respetar la ley de la vida. Precisamente si me marche fue por eso para hacer que tus sufrimientos sean recompensados y para valorarte aun mas.

Bueno pues para cerrar, quiero que sepan que toda madre debe de ser valorada en todo momento realmente de corazon no solo el dia de las madres con una foto en facebook. Estos seres increibles nos dieron la vida y llevan un trabajo con sus hijos de por vida. Especialmente tienen un trabajo mas complicado aquellas madres que tienen hijos discapacitados. Las madres son las que crian a los lideres, maestros, presidentes, profesionales, y ejemplos del mañana asi que su trabajo es el mas importante. Especialmente esas mamas que te apoyan desde el principio merecen estar con uno hasta el final. Asi que si estas leyendo esto manten a tu mama en tu corazon siempre, agradecele a Dios todo lo que ella a echo por ti todos los dias de tu vida y no olvides apoyarla en todo momento.

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